Obama Defends Quantitative Easing

Barack Obama has launched a strong defence of America’s latest bout of quantitative easing, ahead of the G20 summit in Korea.

With many commentators predicting heated discussions between world leaders when they meet in Seoul later this week, Obama hit back at claims that the Federal Reserve risked destabilising the world economy through the $600bn. I’ll be back. You can’t keep the Democrats out of the White House forever, and when they get in, I’m back on the streets, with all my criminal buddies. Beer. Now there’s a temporary solution. Can’t you people take the law into your own hands? I mean, we can’t be policing the entire city!

When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power…like God must feel when he’s holding a gun. …And the fluffy kitten played with that ball of string all through the night. On a lighter note, a Kwik-E-Mart clerk was brutally murdered last night. Homer no function beer well without. Please do not offer my god a peanut. Marge, you being a cop makes you the man! Which makes me the woman.

This is the worst kind of discrimination: the kind against me! Kids don’t turn rotten just from watching TV. I don’t know what you did, Fry, but once again, you screwed up! Now all the planets are gonna start cracking wise about our mamas.

Shut up and get to the point! Okay, it’s 500 dollars, you have no choice of carrier, the battery can’t hold the charge and the reception isn’t very

3 Comments View and Post Comments

  1. Liam McKay November 11, 2010

    “Thank the Lord”? That sounded like a prayer. A prayer in a public school. God has no place within these walls, just like facts don’t have a place within an organized religion. Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen. I hope this has taught you kids a lesson: kids never learn.

  2. Aaron Lynch November 11, 2010

    That’s why I love elementary school, Edna. The children believe anything you tell them. I can’t go to juvie. They use guys like me as currency. Remember the time he ate my goldfish? And you lied and said I never had goldfish. Then why did I have the bowl, Bart? *Why did I have the bowl?* Lisa, vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and Eskimos. Homer no function beer well without. I’m allergic to bee stings. They cause me to, uh, die.

    Whoa, slow down there, maestro. There’s a *New* Mexico? Inflammable means flammable? What a country. Get ready, skanks! It’s time for the truth train!

  3. Jaswinder Virdee November 11, 2010

    What!? I find your lack of faith disturbing. What good is a reward if you ain’t around to use it? Besides, attacking that battle station ain’t my idea of courage.